People judge more than they understand. People criticise more than they appreciate.

FACTS: I had a c-sec. I had to formula feed my baby the first day he arrived in the world because I had not started lactating. I want to get back on my feet. I want a career. I suffered from a bad case of PPD. I do not feed junk to my son. I do not let my son have sugary stuff. I am not depriving him by eliminating screen time. I prefer to give my son fruits over biscuits. I carry my son. I let him cry it out than giving in. I want my son to sleep in his own bed. I want my child to start playschool. I crave some me-time. 

Go ahead – judge me!

We all do. We may not accept or openly admit the fact, but we all have judged another mom at some time or the other and more often than not. I have too. Yes maybe judged you too. Would you like to know in what ways? Maybe not, because those are the same ways you have judged me too.

STOP and think. Think back to the when the mom you were so busy gossiping about could have instead used a friend because she was emotionally drained, or some help because she was bone-tired from chasing her toddler all day. But all she received was snickers and frowns.

We need to stop judging!

• Csec doesn’t make a woman any less of a mother.
• A mother would rather feed her child formula than let him starve.
• Motherhood does not mean you lose sight of who you are.
• Wanting to pursue your career does not mean you don’t love your child
• PPD is real. It paralyzes your senses
• How I feed my child should be my worry. I don’t expect you to take my approval on what you feed your child. Why would you think I would need yours?
• Wanting me-time does not mean I don’t care for my baby
• I am with him 24 hours, seven days a week. I know how to handle my child in public too.

What is funny is that we are quick to judge other mommies for the same situations we have been stuck in.

Remember mommies, the only person who knows your child best is you, that only you know how to raise your kid. Let’s stop mom-judging. Knowing that you are not alone is a big assurance to a mother’s spirit.

We need to STOP! There is no good or bad way of parenting, only mommies trying to give their best. And unless you are a perfect mother who has never faulted once in her journey, you have no right to judge another mommy.

Bottom line is, we are all doing our best. Just because I do it differently from you doesn’t mean I am doing it wrong.

We are all on this crazy roller-coaster together. Our aim is the same. Let’s do this together by supporting each other instead of pulling each other down. United we stand, divided we crawl.

The post United we stand, divided we crawl appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

Make summers fun with drinks for kids to beat the heat and the sweltering, mercury-busting temperatures with home-made healthy drinks.

Sharing with you all my top 5 favorites, easy to make, loved by kids “drinks”:

**These drinks are recommended for toddlers and kids. Some fruits are a strict no=no for children under one. SO be sure to check with your pediatrician before trying.

1. Lemonade – Nothing beats the good old lemonade. It is called the official drink for summers for a reason. Not just refreshing but also nutritious. You can add a twist to it by adding different ingredients to it like:
   • Mint
   • Edible lavender
   • Orange
   • Ginger
2. Smoothies – Be it breakfast, snack or dessert, smoothies not only keep you hydrated but is also filling.
   • Banana Smoothie – Easiest and toddler approved. Add diced banana and milk (you can use soy milk too) to a blender. Blend until the ingredients are combined and smooth. And tada..! Its ready to be served. Depending on your child’s taste buds, you can add your choice of sprinkles. To make variations of this smoothie, simply replace the fruit with another.
   • Mango smoothie
   • Strawberry + raspberry Smoothie
   • Mixed Fruit Smoothie
3. Aam Panna – Kids love mango and what better way to enjoy summers than home made aam panna. This recipe requires raw mangoes, which need to be pressure cooked. Once done, let them cool, peel them well and remove the pulp. Mix pulp with a little sugar and salt. Ass a dash of little cumin seed powder and blend the mixture in a blender. Kids will love its tangy, sweet-salty taste. You can substitute honey instead of regular sugar to make it extra healthy.
4. Juices – I am not in favour of packaged drinks, no matter what the brands claim. And I do not trust the local vendors to use hygienic ways of serving the drink. I prefer extracting the juice at home with a manual juicer or a food processor. Our favourites are:
   • Watermelon juice – Best thirst quencher
   • Pomegranate juice – loaded with anti-oxidants
   • Orange juice – daily dose of Vitamin C!
5. Lassi – Rey is a curd lover! So i had been looking for a recipe that I could prepare for him. I came across this simple yet awesome recipe. https://gkfooddiary.com/plain-lassi-for-babies/All it takes is 5 minutes and best served fresh!
6. Coconut water / Nariyal Paani – Yes, I know I said 5, but I just couldn’t leave this one out! Nariyal paani or coconut water is low in calories, delicious to boot and perhaps the healthiest natural drink you can indulge in on a hot, scorching summer day. It is our go-to-drink when we are traveling within the city. Even better than bottled water. To read of the many benefits of this refreshing natural drink, click here 

Do you have any toddler-approved, favourite summer drinks?

The post Quench the thirst appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

I remember writing this letter to myself sometime last year. Motherhood is a 24/7, exhilarating yet exhausting job. Bottle and Breastfeedings, diaper change, laundry, cooking, organizing activities for the child, home schooling and later school homework. Sometime during this time, life passes you by. Mommyhood is a never-ending responsibility. One that consumes all your time and energy. While initially, the child is totally dependent on the mother and his only solace in this big bright world, being completely immersed in the role is inevitable.

When the celebration of the arrival of the new baby fades away, when the excitement of the latest addition becomes old news, when the responsibilities of motherhood take over, is when the tug of war starts. The war between a woman and a mother.

We look in the mirror yet we cant find ourselves.

WHY?

Often mothers lose themselves in the world of motherhood. Our priorities move from ourselves to the baby long after the baby turns into a toddler and then a young child. We immerse ourselves so deep into looking after and caring for the baby that we end up neglecting ourselves. We are often so busy taking care of everyone else that we neglect to take care of ourselves. And if we fail to take care of ourselves, how can we take care of our children?

Many mothers find themselves at this crossroad where they are torn between taking out time for self vs spending time with the baby. And if somehow they do manage to grab some time out for themselves, they are ridden by the guilt of having prioritized themselves over their children. They demonstrate to the kids that they are low on their own list of priorities.

Mommies! STOP! BREATHE! RELAX! It doesn’t have to be a tug of war! Small things make a huge difference.

• Hand over the baby for a few hours. Your baby is loved just the same by your husband and family as you.
• When they offer help, grab it!
• Stop multi-tasking as if your life depends on it.
• Learn to say no
• Do not judge yourself
• Go for a walk
• Exercise
• Meditate
• Go to a coffee shop – even if you are not a coffee drinker
• Go on a date night with hubby
• Meet friends
• Listen to music
• Go for a movie
• Read a book
• Sleep
• Take out time for that hobby you loved
• Go for a spa
• Oil your hair
• Remember who YOU are.

Remember you cannot pour from an empty vessel. Take care of yourself. Start giving yourself time. Spend time rediscovering the most important person in your life – YOU.

The post Why YOU Matters appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

Sharing with you all the three R’s, the basic values we are trying to inculcate in our son from early on

Respect: Respect for everyone regardless of age, gender or profession. To raise a kind and compassionate child, they need to treat everyone with the same amount of respect. They need to see you doing the same.

• We do not yell or scream at each other. Anytime Rey raises his volume to gain attention, we simply request him (in a calm tone) to speak gently and the minute he does it, we acknowledge with a response.
• Anytime, anyone comes knocking on the door – be it the sweeper or the courier guy or our house help, we ensure to thank them for their help. If Rey is around when they arrive, we ask him too to say Thank You to them for helping us out.
• We ensure we and Rey say hi or jai to people we meet, from relatives to neighbors to society guards. There are times when he is not in the mood to do so, then we wait a few minutes, let him get comfortable and request again.
• Our day starts with a prayer and thanking the almighty for all that we have.
• Watering the plants – not plucking flowers or leaves – teaches him to respect nature
• Be compassionate towards animals – it helps that we have extended family who have pets at home.

Be Responsible – A child who learns to take care of himself and his belongings turns out to be a more responsible and self-disciplined human being. It’s easy to get swayed by the love we have for our children and pamper them. However, it is also important to realize that always picking up after your child is not the only way to show love.

• Small things like not relying on the house-help or nanny to do your work goes a long way. We encourage Rey to keep his dishes in the sink. He does so many times, though it is usually accompanied by a loud noise (he does a basketball throw as he isn’t tall enough to reach the sink yet)
• Recently (maybe 2 months now), I got wall shelves installed in Rey’s play room. It not only helps me keep his toys and books organized, it also serves another purpose. Everytime Rey asks for a new book to read or another toy to play with, I make him hand me the one he was playing with. I explain to him that I’ll keep the toy (one he is not playing with any longer) back before I give him the new one. Now whenever Rey wants a new toy, he himself hands over the old one and asks me to “peep it bat” translated from toddler lingo – its, yes, Keep It Back.
• Don’t let them take the easy route out. I do not jump to help Rey whenever I see he needs help. Let the child make an effort.
• Many more examples – bottom line, they will do as they teach them to do.

Relationships – Families that value each other, stay together. We are living in the times when people are more concerned about themselves than others, neighbours kill each other over parking slots, even families shatter and break at the most trivial of issues, it is important to keep your close ones close. Teach the children to value and respect family. And this can happen only if you speak positively about family members to them.

• We ensure Rey spends time with family as and when possible. We take him to his Nani-Nanu’s (maternal grandparents) house at least twice or thrice in a month which includes a short stay as well.
• He spends quality time with his uncles and aunts and we try and meet them often. He is as fond of them as they are of him.
• He is an only child and we try to get Rey to meet and spend time with his big bro #Keebomiester and baby bro (cousins). Being children, they bond well and we hope we can keep this bond as strong once they grow up.

It is said that by the time a child is 5 or 6 years old, they start differentiating between right and wrong. They look up to their parents (who play a dominant role in modeling the child’s personality) and follow in their footsteps.

Children see, children do. I  do not tire of quoting this line. Children emulate what their parents and family members do. So as a child’s biggest influencers, we need to practice what we preach to our children.

I would love to know what are the basic human values you swear by? How are you teaching them to your children?

The post Inculcating Values In Children appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

As much as we would like to believe, the arrival of a baby and parenthood is not all fun. There are things to learn and challenges to overcome. While the first year has its own challenges, it’s the terrible twos, the terrifying threes and the frightening fours that test you and define you as a family.

People often talk about setting the expectations with the kids. But what about setting expectations as a family?

It is often the most ignored topic in a house. I often hear parents say “But we can’t expect them to alter their lifestyle” or “How can we ask them to change, it is our baby” or “They are old, expecting them to change now is not right”, etc etc.

Here, I beg to differ. Though I do not disregard all of the above and don’t expect people to change their way of life, I do believe that there is always some middle ground to be found. It doesn’t always have to be our way or no way.

Honest, straight-forward communication is essential. Even before our son was born, there were certain expectations that we as a family has agreed upon. These basic expectations were from us to our families and from our families to us.

Before I go ahead, let me make one thing very clear. Rehaan is not a deprived child and neither are we control freaks. We have chosen to give him a clean and healthy start.

• NO JUNK – Absolutely no junk which includes chips, chocolates, toffees, ice-creams, cakes, candies, lollies, aerated drinks, deep fried, street food, etc for the first two years and thereafter as long as we can. No artificial sugar till two. I add organic jaggery to his food. Glad to report that Rey doesn’t know a chocolate from a wafer chip. Even when he is handed a toffee, he gives it away because he doesn’t know what it is.

• DONT GIVE IN TO DEMANDS OR TANTRUMS – Children test you, they will try to manipulate you into giving in to their demands by throwing tantrums. Hold your ground. When the child sees one person in the house caving in, he will invariably go back for more. AND he will want the same expectation from you. If you refuse, you often become the villain. The key here is to maintain the same stance as a family. Mutual understanding in the family is a must to avoid setting an unwanted trend.

• NO SCREENS – Children see, children do. They will never ask you or others for something they don’t see you and anyone else doing. I openly discourage anyone from showing him their phone. Click here to read more on my journey to raising a toddler screen-free.

• NO CONFLICTS in front of the baby – Yes, this one is a little difficult to live in real life. Even healthy decisions when discussed animatedly can sound like an argument to a toddler especially if he is still trying to grasp languages. We have been making a conscious effort of watching our tone when our son is around. We move to a different room when a situation arises.

• Informed DECISIONS vs. age old MYTHS – This one is my favourite and where I am challenged the most. And I don’t mean at home. I mean anywhere there is a generation gap. “We have also raised kids. We raised you guys. Did you not turn out fine?” Phew!! My only argument (when I do make one, most of the times I ignore them and their ignorance) is that its not the same world we are living in, not the same air we breathe, not the same food (chemical-free/unadulterated) we eat. So why the same way of upbringing? A common cold that used to take 2 to 3 days to recover from, now takes weeks, thanks to the pollution and quality of life. Also, technology has grown by leaps and bounds to provide deep insight. It’s not guesswork any longer.

Thankfully, my immediate family is not so difficult to reason with and have accepted and respect the choices we are making. It may or may not work, but it is definitely worth a try. Isn’t it?

What have your challenges been? How have you overcome them as a family?

The post eXpectation Setting appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

Along with joy and happiness, parenthood also brings in a level of responsibility. It’s not easy for the parents to hand over their little one to strangers and is equally unsettling for the child to step away from the security of the environment he has known forever. While a part of us, as parents, is excited about this new chapter in our child’s life, a huge part of us is anxious about handing them over to strangers. But its inevitable.. isn’t it?

Choosing a playschool requires you to invest time and energy. With Rey turning two in December, we knew we had to start doing our homework on schools soon. We started with scouting for play schools in our part of town.

Here’s how we filtered and short-listed a playschool for Rey.

Testimonials and reviews speak volumes about a school’s reputation. We asked our family & friends, checked social media thoroughly for anything which was not acceptable.

Location & distance: something close and easily accessible. Distance also plays a major role. Look for a playschool which is in your vicinity so that it is convenient to reach your child whenever needed. Make sure the location is also strategic and has a better surrounding, for example, no stagnant water bodies around that can lead to diseases, etc.

Security (guarded gates) + Safety (fenced stairs, furniture, toddler proofing): Ensuring CCTV coverage doesn’t guarantee a safe environment but it does help. Pay a visit to the playschool before enrolling your toddler to inspect and satisfy yourself.

Hygiene (including kitchen & washrooms) in and around the school: Children will be spending a considerable amount of time at the playschool (especially if you opt for day boarding too). It is essential that the playschool maintains a hygienic environment for the children o flourish in. Do not miss the toilets.

Learning methodologies & academia: Another important factor is to consider the school’s philosophy and the overall approach towards learning. There are different methodologies playschools follow:

• The Montessori Method – (an approach I have been using with Rey at home too)
• The Reggio Emilia Approach
• The Waldorf Approach
• The HighScope Approach
• Rudolf Steiner Approach

And many more.

 Curriculum + Extracurricular activities + exposure: Check the curriculum the school follows (it should not be draining for the child). Playschool, after all, is about playing and learning. Another important factor is the extracurricular activities like singing, dancing, painting etc. There should be room to just relax as well.

Student – teacher+helper ratio: One of the most important factors. Enquire about the student to teacher ratio so that your child gets proper attention. The fewer children a teacher is in charge for, the better for the child as he will receive more attention and time from his teacher. No matter how efficient, a teacher cannot run a classroom effectively and give the kids the attention they deserve running after 20 kids. Also, check for the school’s helpers ratio and involvement. They help with activities like toilet trips and feeding themselves and moving around the school premises.

Infrastructure + facilities: It helps if the playschool is on the ground floor. With so many children moving around, stairs become a threat to their safety. Check if the school has baby gates installed at every stairs entrance and exit.

Developmental milestones and observation sharing with parents: ANother important factor to consider. SOme playschools have a quarterly reporting system. I personally feel quarterly is too late especially at this stage where the child is in a constant learning phase. Ask the school how often the school shares your child’s development.

The probability of future absorption in higher classes: It is always a plus point as it will relieve you from the hassle of looking for a formal school a year later.

Fee structure: This may be the easiest factor. Get a list of affordable schools that suit your pocket and budget.

In addition to the above, another point to consider (even more than the above points) is to understand your child. Is the school’s approach aligned with your child’s personality? Take your child along for a visit. It will be good to see how your child responds to the environment, the teachers, and the school. Observing your child in the school’s environment will give you an idea whether the school and the child will be a good fit for each other.

Most importantly, trust your instincts. Do not get dazzled by the fancy equipment or play zones or a gleaming building. Don’t depend on the numbers they share of fooled by the marketing strategies they deploy. Pay multiple visits if required. Visit during school hours to get a true picture.

It is, after all, the place where your child’s personality will start getting honed.

What points did you consider when you chose a playschool perfect for your child?

Hope these points and tips will help you make an informed decision. Wish you all the best!

The post The Perfect Playschool appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

Not really. Babywearing has been prevalent for centuries. Work of famous artists from as far back as 18^th century depict women carrying their children on them. In fact as history states, Rani Lakshmi Bai – Queen of Jhansi, wore her son when she went to war against the British.

Present day too, if we cast a glimpse at our villages, women carrying their offsprings in their traditional jhola (carrier) is a common sight. If we happen to cross a construction site or maintenance site even in the city, we often see hard-working women carrying their little ones on their back and labouring away. Women and even men around the world are seen wearing their babies with pride and ease.

We started baby wearing pretty late, something I regret now. We had bought our first carrier when my baby was around 4 months and sold it by the time he was six months. Why? Because it was the wrong choice of carrier and my baby was not comfortable in it and neither were we as parents wearing it. I am glad we resumed when we did. Better late than never.

There are numerous advantages of babywearing. Happy to be sharing the top 5 basis my experience.

1. Babywearing makes traveling easier. For people who know us as, know we are travelers. We love exploring new places, new cultures, interacting with locals, etc. After we had our son, we wanted to continue our passion for traveling the world. Babywearing made that possible.

• Babywearing keeps my baby close to be hence no fear of crowded places.
• Can easliy manage my luggage and baby at public places like airports, train stations, bus deopts, etc
• Do not have to carry a stroller. A carrier anytime takes less space and is lighter. I’d happily save my baggage space for some shopping while traveling.
• No place is off limits due to the terrain – we even went trekking with our baby to a peak in Dalhousie.
• Don’t have to keep looking for an elevator to maneuver as is the case with a stroller.
• When visiting the hills – like we love doing – it keeps my baby snug and warm
• You can be out exploring for long and your baby will not tire of walking as babywearing gives both baby and parents a break.

2. Babywearing promotes bonding. It allows you to keep your baby close, hence they feel safer. They can feel you next to them, hear your voice, and feel the warmth of your body. Studies reveal that babies who are carried or worn, tend to heal faster. Babywearing means you automatically have more physical contact with your little one ultimately strengthening the attachment between the parent and the child.

• I have sometimes worn my son even inside the house, especially during the days he was sick and we were with no help. He was a lot calmer and relaxed when worn.

3. Hands-free! Which basically means freedom and independence. Yes, since you’re not using your arms to carry the baby, your hands are free to tackle the endless household chores or finish your work and meet that dealing looming around the corner.

• I have carried my son and gone shopping, stepped out for walks, written blogs, done multi-tasking all the while keeping y baby close.

4. Exercise – Carrying your baby is nothing less than a workout. Wearing makes it a lot easier however, has a similar impact.

• My only workout on days was wearing my baby and going for walks. I love walking, so mommy and baby both happy!

5. Keeps Toddler tantrums at bay – I’ve often noticed how my son throws a lot less tantrums when being carried as opposed to being on his own. I have total control over his movements so can easily manage him – and prevent him from making a scene – in the middle of a mall – flat on the ground. You get the picture!

Though babywearing is a personal choice and the discussion around it is endless. While some people claim that wearing your baby may end up making him clingy and spoil him. I beg to differ. On the contrary, Babywearing gives your child a sense of security and comfort.  It has been a boon for us and our baby. My son is now 28 months and weighs 12 kgs (all the more reason for to ensure we pack our carrier when we head out) and babywearing has come to our rescue many-a-times.

The post Wearing your baby – Spoiling or Strengthening the Bond? appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

Babies like predictability. They spend nine months in the mother’s womb, protected from the outside world, where there wasn’t much in terms of change. However, once they arrive in an otherwise exciting and chaotic world, where they are learning something new every day, seeing new faces, experiencing new senses; routine provides relief and a calming effect.

A daily routine helps bring in a consistency. Maintaining a regular routine soothes the child, be it an infant or a toddler, in stressful situations.

New Born:

A new-born, who hardly knows what’s going on around him, cannot tell night from day. Routines are particularly helpful in establishing what is known as the circadian rhythm in an infant. Circadian rhythm is a biological clock or a cycle that tells our body when to eat, sleep, etc. It helps distinguish night from day.

Newborns are too young and underdeveloped to follow such patterns. They need to be fed on demand, sleep when they want to, comforted if they need the feel to, etc. Establishing a routine should be introduced gently and gradually.  Exposing them to light when they are awake, dimming the lights of the room when they sleep, these daily habits can slowly help them differentiate between morning and evening and they learn to accordingly adjust their body rhythm.

3^rd month onwards

As new parents, it’s still a challenging time with the infant waking up multiple times for a night feed. However, small activities, like a stroll in the park, regular daily massage, bath around the same time, etc can be introduced as part of the daily routine. By the time the baby hits the half-year milestone, you will have an idea about the number of day naps he takes, his meal times, etc

6 – 8^th month

By now, you are pretty much aware of your baby’s temperament. Night feeds have reduced. Settling into a routine doesn’t look like a distant dream now. Perfect time to start working on it.

A routine imposes order on the roller-coaster that babyhood brings along. Following a routine is the first step for a baby to realize that he has rules to follow. By the time the baby is around 8 months of age, he or she starts to understand that people and objects exist even when they are out of sight. If the child realizes that he or she will be able to get back to the person or the object, they tend to remain calmer. This concept is called Object permanence.

Developing a routine:

Now the million dollar question is how to get started? There is no “by-the-book-method” for it. When my baby was born, I had no idea about how I was going to manage a child. However, as time progressed, I understood my child’s rhythm and we worked together – baby and mommy.

Another thing that helps develop a routine is sticking to the daily tasks and timelines. Establish the important times such as waking-up time, meals, naps, and bedtime. By the time a baby is one year old, he anticipates the daily tasks. He knows that after he has been massaged, it will be time to take a bath. Consistency is important.

It takes time to settle into any routine, so be patient.

From the time my son was an infant, I had been very particular about his routine. Leaving social dos early, planning my day around his naps, carrying his portable bed for extended hours outside. I’ve done it all. I have been rewarded in the long run. My son is now 28 months and barring his transitions, he has enjoyed a predictable day timeline, making our lives a lot easier. His routine is well established, giving me the liberty to plan my day. He is especially particular about his bedtime. So much so, that he slept through the dhol reception of my Brother-in-law’s wedding reception party, while he was in my husband’s arms, who was dancing to the beats of the dhol with the baraat(wedding reception). See for yourself.

Having said that, be prepared for a bit of flexibility. Even the best routine can go kaput. They can not be timed to the minute. There will be days when they will refuse to sleep even 3 hours after their regular nap time. This especially happens by the time they turn 18 months. This is the time they like to test the waters. They like to test the rules. They might not want to take a bath or change into a fresh diaper. It starts resembling a wrestling match. You may have to balance it out. The toddler will be a lot more cooperative if you let them feel as if they are winning. For example, instead of telling him that he has to wear the tee shirt, place two tee-shirts in front of him and let him hand you the one he wants to wear.

There are different view points to it. I shared the one which worked well for me and has helped my toddler remain in a safe zone till now.

It’s important to respect routines and also realize that you will never have full control over them. Stay sensitive and adaptable to your baby’s needs.

The post Routine Matters appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

It is one of the first things a couple starts to think about even before their child is born. While some couples take a lot of factors into consideration, some want the most unique name for their child. Some like it trendy, some traditional. As expectant parents, we too were super excited about what or rather who was to come. Not knowing the gender of the unborn baby only added to that excitement. Fortunately for us, neither of our families believed in consulting the pundits for a letter to pick a name from, so our options weren’t limited.

And so started the task of jotting down names that we both already liked, asking for recommendations from family and friends, picking names off our favourite TV series (skipped GoT though, imagine Tyrion or Hound going down in that list!) and movies. My friends shared excel sheets with thousands of names in them. No kidding! I am guilty of skimming past most of them though.

My husband and I looked up meanings, pronunciations, and variations of quite a few names. We discussed and disagreed, ooh and aahed and kept narrowing down the list.

Finally, around the eight month of my pregnancy, we narrowed down the names to five. Five boy names and five girl names.

And by the time it was time for the baby to arrive, we had zeroed in on one name – each for a boy and a girl.

I had really, like really wanted and prayed for a baby girl, right from the time I suspected I was pregnant till the time I was in the OT (yes C-sec because my baby refused to let go of the umbilical cord) till the very moment the doc brought the baby in front of my eyes. My gynaec asked me then “Sejal what do you think? Boy or Girl?” Even then my response was GIRL! And then she showed me my baby’s face and before she could tell me who had arrived, I was already head over heels for the little, pink bundle in front of me. That point in time, it didn’t matter what I wanted. What mattered was that I had been blessed. Blessed with the most adorable baby boy I had ever laid my eyes on. And my heart called out and welcomed the baby.

Why did we choose that name? Where did it lead us? Click on the link to finish reading the story:

https://bit.ly/2r2jZS3

This blog was originally written for World Of Moms.

The post What’s in the NAME? appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

There’s no guidebook to the motherhood journey. It solely relies on instinct and experience.

When I became a mother (still has that fresh ting to it :)), I had no idea what modern-day parenting was, I didn’t know what BLW or sleep training was, I had no clues about attachment parenting or gentle parenting, I was unaware of baby-wearing and the evolution of cloth diapering, I was clueless about Montessori learning methodologies, and the list can go on and on.

All I knew was that I had been blessed with a healthy, adorable little bundle who will undoubtedly demand all my time and love. All I knew was that I was going to do the best I could for my child. I wasn’t a part of any race or a competition. I wasn’t out there trying to show “how it’s done”. I wasn’t trying to earn the title of a “good mother” or a “hands-on mother”. All I was trying to do (and still do is) what I feel is good for my child’s well-being.

As my journey progressed, I learned from my experience, I learned from those around. But the biggest and the most important lesson I learned was to listen to my mom-instincts. I confess, when I was a new mommy, there were times when I had been influenced by how other moms were dealing with motherhood. I gained insight, learned a lot of things I had no clue about, and I am forever grateful for those who made me aware and shared their experiences. But there were also times I regretted not following my gut. There were times when their hit, sure-shot formula backfired when I tried it. I realized what my elders expected me to do wasn’t always the right or the only way to do it.

When you become a mother, there are as many pieces of advice as the well-meaning people you know. It is easy to get lost in the sea of unsolicited advice you receive.

Here are my biggest learnings from my motherhood journey I have been on so far.

• TRUST your instincts. It doesn’t mean turn a deaf ear to what other experienced mothers have to say. It simply means, follow your heart. If you feel, what they say is what might work for you, go for it. But if you feel it’s not right, no matter how pressured you feel, don’t follow that advice. My golden rule has been to – Listen to all, do as your heart says.
• It’s not a race! It’s an experience. Enjoy your journey. Don’t let how others are raising their children overwhelm you. Like no two pregnancies are the same, no two children are the same. And hence, the way they are brought up will also differ.
• There is no such thing as bad parenting or good parenting. Only parents doing what they consider is the best basis their experience and capabilities.
• Learn, try, move on. Yes. There will be failures along the way. And that’s absolutely fine. Learn from your child. Get up and start walking again.
• Social media is not an expert. There is only so much an Instagram account can tell you. Yes, there are tons of insta-moms (including myself) out there, thousands of blogs (including this one) that will give help you understand this journey, but only a mother can truly understand what her child truly needs.
• Motherhood journey: Document if you want to. Maintain privacy if you think that’s how you will be comfortable. Don’t get influenced by others.
•  If there is one person you should follow, follow your doctor’s advice. And your child’s pediatrician.
• Make life simpler for yourself by blocking anyone who makes you feel inferior. Without meaning to do so, some people end up making you feel bad. Instead of feeling inspired, you end up feeling miserable. Ctl+Alt-Del. End task. Or at least distance yourself till you become stable.Unless they inspire you.

And lastly, ignore these points if you feel they won’t and don’t add value to your journey. It’s as simple as that.

We’re always learning – it doesn’t matter from whom, others or your own experiences. As long as we do what’s best for these tiny humans, is what matters.

Would love to hear about your experience and what helped you or is helping you stay a positive person. Or what have your challenges been and how are you dealing with them.

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