I set out on a challenge. A letter a day. And today, with just a few minutes to spare, I am about to reach the finish line.

To be honest, I wasn’t very keen on taking up this challenge. Already pressed for time, with a toddler to look after, forever exhausted, it seemed impossible to me. But as they say, there’s always someone watching over you. For me, it came in the form of my dear friend and confidante Tamanna. She encouraged me to join, pushed me to keep going and motivated me to finish the challenge. Thanks Tammy!

This month has been about rediscovering myself as a writer. I still have miles to go but at least I have started.

I remember April 1 and 2 and 3 and maybe more, when it took me two days just to write one blog. When staring at a blank screen was all I did. And thinking about these last few days when I have written on over ten topics. Some in less than an hour.

I remember feeling under-confident, doubting myself. What if I am not able to write anything? What if no one likes my work? What if I end up making mistakes, etc etc. All those worries are now miles away.

In the last four weeks, I have rediscovered my own grit and level of determination. Deep fire within me egged me on. There were days when I felt that I was wasting my time if I wasn’t writing. All my focus and thoughts were on this challenge which kept me away from harbouring negative thoughts or dwelling on meaningless worldly concerns.

The last few days – the determination of completing this challenge, of staying awake till 4 AM to write blogs and waking up at 7 AM to look after my toddler – have felt nothing less than an adventure-packed, fast-paced movie.

The excitement I felt last night when I realised I was just two blogs from successfully completing this challenge was akin to staying awake on the eve of the maiden international vacation. My mind simply refused to switch off and I kept thinking of what I wanted to write on next.

Thanks, Blog Chatter for giving me an opportunity to feel the zeal again.

The post Zip Zap Zoom appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

People judge more than they understand. People criticise more than they appreciate.

FACTS: I had a c-sec. I had to formula feed my baby the first day he arrived in the world because I had not started lactating. I want to get back on my feet. I want a career. I suffered from a bad case of PPD. I do not feed junk to my son. I do not let my son have sugary stuff. I am not depriving him by eliminating screen time. I prefer to give my son fruits over biscuits. I carry my son. I let him cry it out than giving in. I want my son to sleep in his own bed. I want my child to start playschool. I crave some me-time. 

Go ahead – judge me!

We all do. We may not accept or openly admit the fact, but we all have judged another mom at some time or the other and more often than not. I have too. Yes maybe judged you too. Would you like to know in what ways? Maybe not, because those are the same ways you have judged me too.

STOP and think. Think back to the when the mom you were so busy gossiping about could have instead used a friend because she was emotionally drained, or some help because she was bone-tired from chasing her toddler all day. But all she received was snickers and frowns.

We need to stop judging!

• Csec doesn’t make a woman any less of a mother.
• A mother would rather feed her child formula than let him starve.
• Motherhood does not mean you lose sight of who you are.
• Wanting to pursue your career does not mean you don’t love your child
• PPD is real. It paralyzes your senses
• How I feed my child should be my worry. I don’t expect you to take my approval on what you feed your child. Why would you think I would need yours?
• Wanting me-time does not mean I don’t care for my baby
• I am with him 24 hours, seven days a week. I know how to handle my child in public too.

What is funny is that we are quick to judge other mommies for the same situations we have been stuck in.

Remember mommies, the only person who knows your child best is you, that only you know how to raise your kid. Let’s stop mom-judging. Knowing that you are not alone is a big assurance to a mother’s spirit.

We need to STOP! There is no good or bad way of parenting, only mommies trying to give their best. And unless you are a perfect mother who has never faulted once in her journey, you have no right to judge another mommy.

Bottom line is, we are all doing our best. Just because I do it differently from you doesn’t mean I am doing it wrong.

We are all on this crazy roller-coaster together. Our aim is the same. Let’s do this together by supporting each other instead of pulling each other down. United we stand, divided we crawl.

The post United we stand, divided we crawl appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

I remember writing this letter to myself sometime last year. Motherhood is a 24/7, exhilarating yet exhausting job. Bottle and Breastfeedings, diaper change, laundry, cooking, organizing activities for the child, home schooling and later school homework. Sometime during this time, life passes you by. Mommyhood is a never-ending responsibility. One that consumes all your time and energy. While initially, the child is totally dependent on the mother and his only solace in this big bright world, being completely immersed in the role is inevitable.

When the celebration of the arrival of the new baby fades away, when the excitement of the latest addition becomes old news, when the responsibilities of motherhood take over, is when the tug of war starts. The war between a woman and a mother.

We look in the mirror yet we cant find ourselves.

WHY?

Often mothers lose themselves in the world of motherhood. Our priorities move from ourselves to the baby long after the baby turns into a toddler and then a young child. We immerse ourselves so deep into looking after and caring for the baby that we end up neglecting ourselves. We are often so busy taking care of everyone else that we neglect to take care of ourselves. And if we fail to take care of ourselves, how can we take care of our children?

Many mothers find themselves at this crossroad where they are torn between taking out time for self vs spending time with the baby. And if somehow they do manage to grab some time out for themselves, they are ridden by the guilt of having prioritized themselves over their children. They demonstrate to the kids that they are low on their own list of priorities.

Mommies! STOP! BREATHE! RELAX! It doesn’t have to be a tug of war! Small things make a huge difference.

• Hand over the baby for a few hours. Your baby is loved just the same by your husband and family as you.
• When they offer help, grab it!
• Stop multi-tasking as if your life depends on it.
• Learn to say no
• Do not judge yourself
• Go for a walk
• Exercise
• Meditate
• Go to a coffee shop – even if you are not a coffee drinker
• Go on a date night with hubby
• Meet friends
• Listen to music
• Go for a movie
• Read a book
• Sleep
• Take out time for that hobby you loved
• Go for a spa
• Oil your hair
• Remember who YOU are.

Remember you cannot pour from an empty vessel. Take care of yourself. Start giving yourself time. Spend time rediscovering the most important person in your life – YOU.

The post Why YOU Matters appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

Sharing with you all the three R’s, the basic values we are trying to inculcate in our son from early on

Respect: Respect for everyone regardless of age, gender or profession. To raise a kind and compassionate child, they need to treat everyone with the same amount of respect. They need to see you doing the same.

• We do not yell or scream at each other. Anytime Rey raises his volume to gain attention, we simply request him (in a calm tone) to speak gently and the minute he does it, we acknowledge with a response.
• Anytime, anyone comes knocking on the door – be it the sweeper or the courier guy or our house help, we ensure to thank them for their help. If Rey is around when they arrive, we ask him too to say Thank You to them for helping us out.
• We ensure we and Rey say hi or jai to people we meet, from relatives to neighbors to society guards. There are times when he is not in the mood to do so, then we wait a few minutes, let him get comfortable and request again.
• Our day starts with a prayer and thanking the almighty for all that we have.
• Watering the plants – not plucking flowers or leaves – teaches him to respect nature
• Be compassionate towards animals – it helps that we have extended family who have pets at home.

Be Responsible – A child who learns to take care of himself and his belongings turns out to be a more responsible and self-disciplined human being. It’s easy to get swayed by the love we have for our children and pamper them. However, it is also important to realize that always picking up after your child is not the only way to show love.

• Small things like not relying on the house-help or nanny to do your work goes a long way. We encourage Rey to keep his dishes in the sink. He does so many times, though it is usually accompanied by a loud noise (he does a basketball throw as he isn’t tall enough to reach the sink yet)
• Recently (maybe 2 months now), I got wall shelves installed in Rey’s play room. It not only helps me keep his toys and books organized, it also serves another purpose. Everytime Rey asks for a new book to read or another toy to play with, I make him hand me the one he was playing with. I explain to him that I’ll keep the toy (one he is not playing with any longer) back before I give him the new one. Now whenever Rey wants a new toy, he himself hands over the old one and asks me to “peep it bat” translated from toddler lingo – its, yes, Keep It Back.
• Don’t let them take the easy route out. I do not jump to help Rey whenever I see he needs help. Let the child make an effort.
• Many more examples – bottom line, they will do as they teach them to do.

Relationships – Families that value each other, stay together. We are living in the times when people are more concerned about themselves than others, neighbours kill each other over parking slots, even families shatter and break at the most trivial of issues, it is important to keep your close ones close. Teach the children to value and respect family. And this can happen only if you speak positively about family members to them.

• We ensure Rey spends time with family as and when possible. We take him to his Nani-Nanu’s (maternal grandparents) house at least twice or thrice in a month which includes a short stay as well.
• He spends quality time with his uncles and aunts and we try and meet them often. He is as fond of them as they are of him.
• He is an only child and we try to get Rey to meet and spend time with his big bro #Keebomiester and baby bro (cousins). Being children, they bond well and we hope we can keep this bond as strong once they grow up.

It is said that by the time a child is 5 or 6 years old, they start differentiating between right and wrong. They look up to their parents (who play a dominant role in modeling the child’s personality) and follow in their footsteps.

Children see, children do. I  do not tire of quoting this line. Children emulate what their parents and family members do. So as a child’s biggest influencers, we need to practice what we preach to our children.

I would love to know what are the basic human values you swear by? How are you teaching them to your children?

The post Inculcating Values In Children appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

Not really. Babywearing has been prevalent for centuries. Work of famous artists from as far back as 18^th century depict women carrying their children on them. In fact as history states, Rani Lakshmi Bai – Queen of Jhansi, wore her son when she went to war against the British.

Present day too, if we cast a glimpse at our villages, women carrying their offsprings in their traditional jhola (carrier) is a common sight. If we happen to cross a construction site or maintenance site even in the city, we often see hard-working women carrying their little ones on their back and labouring away. Women and even men around the world are seen wearing their babies with pride and ease.

We started baby wearing pretty late, something I regret now. We had bought our first carrier when my baby was around 4 months and sold it by the time he was six months. Why? Because it was the wrong choice of carrier and my baby was not comfortable in it and neither were we as parents wearing it. I am glad we resumed when we did. Better late than never.

There are numerous advantages of babywearing. Happy to be sharing the top 5 basis my experience.

1. Babywearing makes traveling easier. For people who know us as, know we are travelers. We love exploring new places, new cultures, interacting with locals, etc. After we had our son, we wanted to continue our passion for traveling the world. Babywearing made that possible.

• Babywearing keeps my baby close to be hence no fear of crowded places.
• Can easliy manage my luggage and baby at public places like airports, train stations, bus deopts, etc
• Do not have to carry a stroller. A carrier anytime takes less space and is lighter. I’d happily save my baggage space for some shopping while traveling.
• No place is off limits due to the terrain – we even went trekking with our baby to a peak in Dalhousie.
• Don’t have to keep looking for an elevator to maneuver as is the case with a stroller.
• When visiting the hills – like we love doing – it keeps my baby snug and warm
• You can be out exploring for long and your baby will not tire of walking as babywearing gives both baby and parents a break.

2. Babywearing promotes bonding. It allows you to keep your baby close, hence they feel safer. They can feel you next to them, hear your voice, and feel the warmth of your body. Studies reveal that babies who are carried or worn, tend to heal faster. Babywearing means you automatically have more physical contact with your little one ultimately strengthening the attachment between the parent and the child.

• I have sometimes worn my son even inside the house, especially during the days he was sick and we were with no help. He was a lot calmer and relaxed when worn.

3. Hands-free! Which basically means freedom and independence. Yes, since you’re not using your arms to carry the baby, your hands are free to tackle the endless household chores or finish your work and meet that dealing looming around the corner.

• I have carried my son and gone shopping, stepped out for walks, written blogs, done multi-tasking all the while keeping y baby close.

4. Exercise – Carrying your baby is nothing less than a workout. Wearing makes it a lot easier however, has a similar impact.

• My only workout on days was wearing my baby and going for walks. I love walking, so mommy and baby both happy!

5. Keeps Toddler tantrums at bay – I’ve often noticed how my son throws a lot less tantrums when being carried as opposed to being on his own. I have total control over his movements so can easily manage him – and prevent him from making a scene – in the middle of a mall – flat on the ground. You get the picture!

Though babywearing is a personal choice and the discussion around it is endless. While some people claim that wearing your baby may end up making him clingy and spoil him. I beg to differ. On the contrary, Babywearing gives your child a sense of security and comfort.  It has been a boon for us and our baby. My son is now 28 months and weighs 12 kgs (all the more reason for to ensure we pack our carrier when we head out) and babywearing has come to our rescue many-a-times.

The post Wearing your baby – Spoiling or Strengthening the Bond? appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

Once you graduate, the constant pressure to get married (especially for women) starts piling up. When you get married, the next barrage of well-meaning advice is to have a baby – complete your family – they say. Oh well, alright. And along comes a baby.

The baby hasn’t even started walking confidently yet and look, there’s the bombardment again – yes. You guessed it right. The baby needs company. Complete your family. You don’t want him to be alone after you’re gone. Blah blah.

Even before I got married, when my husband I were dating, we were clear on how we wanted our family to grow. That’s where communication plays a major role. Talk. Discuss. Agree (or agree to disagree). There were two things we both agreed to:

1. We will not rush into starting a family
2. We will have only one child

I am glad that we were able to stick to our commitments.

1. No matter how long you’ve known your partner and how deep your love is, the real compatibility test starts when you start living together. There are behaviours you discover, quirks you try to accept, and a family you get to know. There are agreements and arguments, celebrations and compromise, love and lash-outs. The child changes the equation between a husband and wife. From “two is company” you jump to “three is a party”, leaving you with no time for yourselves for a while. It is a journey that challenges you and tests you at your most vulnerable point. And until the man and woman cruise on smooth waters, getting a child into this world is a risky matter (purely our opinion).

We had been married three and a half years before we embarked on the parenthood journey with all our valour. And even then, there are days when we find ourselves not on the same side of the court. But we’ve learned and we’re still sailing.

2. Only one child (whether by choice or through necessity). Phew! Now this one is a little difficult to explain especially to those who think one is not enough. If you and your partner have decided to have one child, you will find a lot of people offering you unsolicited advice. After all is said and done, how many children you wish to have is solely your decision as parents. Given the times we are living in, and how unpredictable this world is becoming, this decision took a lot of thought.

• We, as parents, are happy to have one child. And as parents, it’s our decision to decide how many children we want to get into this world
• With the way the world is progressing (read a study that by 2050, all aquatic life will disappear), pollution, global warming, natural calamities on the rise, forest fires etc, why would I want to bring more lives on this planet that is already struggling to live.
• Any newspaper you pick up is full of violence, of shootouts, of abductions and rapes and murders. Living in the times of fear. Is this the society I want to raise my children in? Nope.

Yes, we were aware that no matter what decision we make, there will always be another to counter. Sharing with you a few points we as parents often ponder upon before making that humungous decision. A few benefits as well as challenges of having an only child.

Plus / Pros / Benefits –

• More time to devote to your child so the child gets undivided love and attention. Quality time with the child helping him focus more intimately on these relationships.
• Better quality of life. Let’s face it – if only incomes would increase in direct proportion to the family size! The inflow of funds is unaffected by the family size, however, the outflow and expenditure totally depend on the number of people dependent on that income. So one child = more financial stability, hence better life quality for all. An only child gets the best of everything – material things and otherwise.
• More energy – this one is a no-brainer!
• More independent child – without an elder sibling to support every step, the child will find his own footing, make friends outside of his first circle, become more social
• No sibling rivalry
• No comparisons 

Challenges:

• Growing up alone – it depends on what kind of environment do the parents foster at home. Are they around to fill the gap?
• Companionship – We all crave company our age, so do children.
• Sharing – Living with someone means sharing their space and stuff. Siblings learn that lesson pretty quickly.

Just like there are two sides to a coin, there are two perspectives towards everything. You just got to decide which one will make you happier. In the end, how a child turns out to be is totally dependent on how the child is brought up.

The post Only child? appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

Parties, club hopping, designer dresses and Stuart Weitzman. Ok, maybe not Stuart, that’s taking it too far. Guccis and Louboutins.

Fancy hotels, expensive Liqueurs, and postcard photos. A larger than life lifestyle.

Perfect pout, high heels, and salon ready hair. This – while working in the kitchen which doesn’t have anything out of place or even a stain to prove that anything has ever been used.

These photos portray a life one can’t help but wish for.

That is social media for you. Where everyone (well almost) is trying to portray a life so perfect that the gullible and unsuspecting might end up feeling like complete losers.

Their picture-perfect lives, spotless homes, fancy lifestyle is what people start wishing for. What they do not realize is that it’s more often than not a sham. That the “memories” are often staged, that the “moment” is specially set up for a photo-op. In a bid to maintain the “perfect” virtual profile, they sacrifice a lot more in their real life.

That kitchen.. it was cleaned especially for the photo. And all the items which usually decorate the slab, shoved into a corner and out of the camera frame.

That picturesque snap that made you yearn to travel to the place took him hours to edit and process.

Those adorable smiles in that candid shot? Well, that’s one out of the hundred shots which were clicked that day which wasn’t blurred or unbalanced in composition.

Those parties? Those check-ins? Well, how does you paryting, getting drunk and getting clicked in a hundred different poses interest me anyway?

If we start comparing us to what we see on social media, we would never be satisfied with what we have and how we are. It’s a facade. Next time you see a profile and wish for a life like their’s, think again. Think if you really want to live in an illusion. Or would you rather live a life that’s real?

Would you like to live in a grid or a bubble or would you rather keep it real?

The post Keep it real appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

A keen learner, she picked up the ropes of the corporate world pretty quickly. From a newbie to a professional, she soon garnered enough experience and appreciation to try for bigger and better roles. She got what she went after. There wasn’t an interview she wasn’t able to crack. She quickly rose through the ranks. A favourite among her audience and admired by her co-workers, she worked hard to prove her mettle. She saved most of her salary. She travelled, she explored.

Soon there was enough in her kitty to fulfil her dreams and support her family, she rewarded herself by buying herself a car. A childhood dream of being able to drive, sitting behind the wheel, zooming past the landscape, feeling the wind on her face (ok.. AC, given the unapologetic weather and pollution in her city), listening to the slight hum of music in the background.

Life was good. She had a loving clan, friends who were family. She had everything going for her. She even met someone who was perfect for her. In a whirlwind romance sort of way, they met, dated, got engaged and married – all within a few months. She was growing not just as an individual but also professionally. There was only one thing left to complete the picture. And God was kind enough to bless them with it – a baby.

She couldn’t have been happier. She was blessed. She adored her baby, spent sleepless nights making sure he was comfortable, made sure he got the best of upbringing. She was termed as a model parent. She was glad to be able to spend those crucial years with her son. Helping him through the formative years of his life.

But life changed.

As much as she loved her son, there was always something nagging her. Having worked almost all of her adult life, she didn’t know how to cope with being at home all day long. There wasn’t a moment to rest yet she felt the hours dragging by. There was something she felt that kept piercing her from within.

She felt caged. She felt suffocated. She knew she wasn’t happy. She could never be – for she wasn’t built that way. She wasn’t built to stay at home. It was the biggest dilemma she had ever faced in her life. But she admitted and accepted the fact.

She missed it.

She missed the independence. She missed working. She missed the environment. She missed the brain-storming. She missed nurturing in a different way. She missed the adrenalin rush that came with each presentation. She missed getting ready every day. Missed the appreciations her hard work brought in. She missed the financial independence, missed growing and learning.

She missed it.

Being a parent is the most overwhelming reward ever. There are things you need to choose between. These decisions are not always as easy or as obvious as the society makes them be. There are expectations. There are restrictions. There are examples. There is unsolicited advice. It takes time to accept your own decisions.

Being a parent is life-changing. It takes time to give up the independence that was a part of you. 

One is your heart and the other is your way of being. There are no comparisons. There can never be. It is about finding the inner peace.

The post Inner Peace appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

Time is the biggest healer. With time you move on. There are new beginnings, new memories to be created and cherished. All this is true. But what when the one who rejects you for someone else is your own child?

And that is the dilemma I was in. I clearly remember when the first time it happened.

We were holidaying in Goa. Our first together as a family. A ten-day long break in the fisherman village called Arambol. We had rented an apartment as we wanted access to a kitchen to prepare meals for Rey as opposed to feeding him from restaurants for ten days, which for him would’ve been over thirty meals.

We are travellers and we do a lot of exploration on foot. That is how we are raising Rehaan too. Back in October 2016, we had yet not experienced the joy of baby-wearing and were pretty much ignorant of its advantages. We had decided against bringing a stroller for this trip as we already had too much baggage for ten days (maybe a mistake if I look back now). We took turns carrying Rehaan, but it was soon clear that Daddy was the physically stronger one and hence doing most of the ferrying. I was happy to see them bond and spend quality time together. After all, I was the one who had been asking for a break and a holiday.

It was post this trip that I noticed the sudden changes. He was old enough to show his preference. Though he would be happy with me all day long and refuse to go to anyone else. He would shower his love, his attention, his smiles on me. But all that would change when the clock struck 9 every night. That’s when I was given the boot. I kept telling myself that children soon grow out of this phase and my baby too will. I wasn’t jealous, just heart-broken and felt unneeded. It hurt. I reasoned that it was because he had less time with his daddy as compared to me, and maybe he wanted to make the most of it.

Nine months of having him exclusively to me in my womb. Another ten months of feeling needed. That feeling that you’re the world for this little someone. That his day started with waking up to me and nights in my arms. And now all of a sudden, that changed. He wanted to be held by Daddy. Wanted to be fed by him. Wanted Daddy to play with him. Wanted Daddy.

I remember coming back after an assignment one day and hoping to get the same reaction as he usually gave his Daddy. With my heart thumping, I walked in. Half afraid, half excited to meet my baby who I had left alone for hours for the first time. Yes, he came running. Yes, he hugged me. Yes, he showered me with smiles. It is later that I realised how I had been holding my breath that evening. Such was the anxiety that ran through my blood, fuelled by the postpartum depression that had taken over my happiness in those months.

Rey is now a toddler. I miss my tiny squishy-ball. I miss holding him, cradling him to sleep, I miss his outstretched arms urging me to pick him up. I miss all this and more. And though he is a lot more relaxed now and not as clingy to his father (except for on vacations, maybe because he prefers a better view from up there), there are still those moments when he favours his father. And sometimes, I still feel sad not being the one he prefers. Not being the one he runs to.

I know that I will always be his mom. That no matter what, my love and affection for him will only grow with each passing day. That we will always have a deeper connection than anyone else can have with each other. I’ve been told it’s a phase. It will pass. I’ve looked it up and I know am not an isolated case. But it still breaks my heart into a million pieces everytime he turns the other way. When he plays favourites.

Mom heart. Mom life. Sigh.

The post Playing Favourites appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

Leave aside the external factors, one of the biggest reasons for the failure is because we end up expecting too much. I am a culprit too. We expect from our partner, from our families, from friends, from children, from neighbours, from society, from colleagues, from the governing parties, from EVERYONE and that includes yourself.

Broadly speaking, there are two species of this monster. There are Expectations you have from people and Expectations that people have of you.

I remember attending a workshop at The Landmark Forum which made me do a deep dive assessment of my behaviour and how it was impacting my present and shaping my future. One of those introspections included the expectations that weigh us down. And more importantly the stress on how, more often than not, it’s our expectation of people that disappoint us. It was not something I didn’t already know. Yet it brought with it an epiphany of how I was the one responsible for ruining my mood, day after day.

Even Alexander Pope (the greatest English poet of the eighteenth century) said and I quote “Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.” One of the key factors that helped me resurface from my blues postpartum was acknowledging this fact. Not that I am immune to this syndrome now, I am just more conscious of the fact that I control what I feel. I can either feel let down when my expectation – which was set by me – was not met. Or I can simply not expect much from others. The choice is mine.

The other species – people’s expectation from you is even more interesting.

Some 8 or 9 years back when my parents started looking for a match for me, one of the first questions they were asked is if I could cook. I think those people had confused the job profile of a chef to a wife. Well, such were their expectations from the woman they wanted to welcome in the family. Thank heavens, I didn’t apply for that role. They would have had to spend their life regretting hiring me.

I got married in 2011 and remember the events that led up to my wedding day. One of the first on my to-do list was to finalize the invitation list. I remember having multiple discussions on why we had to invite “family” we hadn’t spoken to in years and met even less. The logic I was given was that they had invited us to their son’s/daughter’s wedding some 15 years back and would expect an invitation. I don’t even remember these distant relative’s faces. Alas, they were invited. And when they approached us on stage to give us the customary congratulatory blessings, all I could muster was a Hello Uncle & Aunty for I didn’t even remember if they were my chacha/chachi/bua/mama/maami/maasi…you get the idea.

When the news of my pregnancy spread and congratulatory wished flew in, also came in remarks as to how I will have to be strong and look after the baby (isn’t carrying a baby for nine months and going through delivery enough proof of a woman’s strength?). How I will need to look after the baby day and night. My husband would return exhausted from work and need rest and “proper” sleep to return to work the next day. Well, what about the mother who has gone through an excruciating labour/c-sec and needs rest for recovery, yet is managing and taking care of a newborn baby. OMG! The expectations people have!

People expect you to “like” every one of their 7654 photos on FB from the same vacation. They expect you to show up just because they have invited you even if its 56 seconds before the party kick-off time. They expect you to have all answers. They expect you to raise a perfect kid. They expect you to respond to every one of their WhatsApp messages.

The examples are aplenty. Kya kahenge Log. Sabse bada yeh rog (What will people say, the biggest disorder). Somebody once said to me that expectations are disappointments in the making. The burden of these expectation creates a false sense of how things should be.

It’s alright to have expectations. However, you also need to accept that they won’t always come through. It’s best to be prepared in case what you expect doesn’t happen. Liberate yourself from the trap these expectations lay. It’s a beautiful journey from there on.

 “Expectations were like fine pottery. The harder you held them, the more likely they were to crack.”
― Brandon Sanderson

The post Great Expectations appeared first on Raising Rehaan.