As much as we would like to believe, the arrival of a baby and parenthood is not all fun. There are things to learn and challenges to overcome. While the first year has its own challenges, it’s the terrible twos, the terrifying threes and the frightening fours that test you and define you as a family.

People often talk about setting the expectations with the kids. But what about setting expectations as a family?

It is often the most ignored topic in a house. I often hear parents say “But we can’t expect them to alter their lifestyle” or “How can we ask them to change, it is our baby” or “They are old, expecting them to change now is not right”, etc etc.

Here, I beg to differ. Though I do not disregard all of the above and don’t expect people to change their way of life, I do believe that there is always some middle ground to be found. It doesn’t always have to be our way or no way.

Honest, straight-forward communication is essential. Even before our son was born, there were certain expectations that we as a family has agreed upon. These basic expectations were from us to our families and from our families to us.

Before I go ahead, let me make one thing very clear. Rehaan is not a deprived child and neither are we control freaks. We have chosen to give him a clean and healthy start.

• NO JUNK – Absolutely no junk which includes chips, chocolates, toffees, ice-creams, cakes, candies, lollies, aerated drinks, deep fried, street food, etc for the first two years and thereafter as long as we can. No artificial sugar till two. I add organic jaggery to his food. Glad to report that Rey doesn’t know a chocolate from a wafer chip. Even when he is handed a toffee, he gives it away because he doesn’t know what it is.

• DONT GIVE IN TO DEMANDS OR TANTRUMS – Children test you, they will try to manipulate you into giving in to their demands by throwing tantrums. Hold your ground. When the child sees one person in the house caving in, he will invariably go back for more. AND he will want the same expectation from you. If you refuse, you often become the villain. The key here is to maintain the same stance as a family. Mutual understanding in the family is a must to avoid setting an unwanted trend.

• NO SCREENS – Children see, children do. They will never ask you or others for something they don’t see you and anyone else doing. I openly discourage anyone from showing him their phone. Click here to read more on my journey to raising a toddler screen-free.

• NO CONFLICTS in front of the baby – Yes, this one is a little difficult to live in real life. Even healthy decisions when discussed animatedly can sound like an argument to a toddler especially if he is still trying to grasp languages. We have been making a conscious effort of watching our tone when our son is around. We move to a different room when a situation arises.

• Informed DECISIONS vs. age old MYTHS – This one is my favourite and where I am challenged the most. And I don’t mean at home. I mean anywhere there is a generation gap. “We have also raised kids. We raised you guys. Did you not turn out fine?” Phew!! My only argument (when I do make one, most of the times I ignore them and their ignorance) is that its not the same world we are living in, not the same air we breathe, not the same food (chemical-free/unadulterated) we eat. So why the same way of upbringing? A common cold that used to take 2 to 3 days to recover from, now takes weeks, thanks to the pollution and quality of life. Also, technology has grown by leaps and bounds to provide deep insight. It’s not guesswork any longer.

Thankfully, my immediate family is not so difficult to reason with and have accepted and respect the choices we are making. It may or may not work, but it is definitely worth a try. Isn’t it?

What have your challenges been? How have you overcome them as a family?

The post eXpectation Setting appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

Along with joy and happiness, parenthood also brings in a level of responsibility. It’s not easy for the parents to hand over their little one to strangers and is equally unsettling for the child to step away from the security of the environment he has known forever. While a part of us, as parents, is excited about this new chapter in our child’s life, a huge part of us is anxious about handing them over to strangers. But its inevitable.. isn’t it?

Choosing a playschool requires you to invest time and energy. With Rey turning two in December, we knew we had to start doing our homework on schools soon. We started with scouting for play schools in our part of town.

Here’s how we filtered and short-listed a playschool for Rey.

Testimonials and reviews speak volumes about a school’s reputation. We asked our family & friends, checked social media thoroughly for anything which was not acceptable.

Location & distance: something close and easily accessible. Distance also plays a major role. Look for a playschool which is in your vicinity so that it is convenient to reach your child whenever needed. Make sure the location is also strategic and has a better surrounding, for example, no stagnant water bodies around that can lead to diseases, etc.

Security (guarded gates) + Safety (fenced stairs, furniture, toddler proofing): Ensuring CCTV coverage doesn’t guarantee a safe environment but it does help. Pay a visit to the playschool before enrolling your toddler to inspect and satisfy yourself.

Hygiene (including kitchen & washrooms) in and around the school: Children will be spending a considerable amount of time at the playschool (especially if you opt for day boarding too). It is essential that the playschool maintains a hygienic environment for the children o flourish in. Do not miss the toilets.

Learning methodologies & academia: Another important factor is to consider the school’s philosophy and the overall approach towards learning. There are different methodologies playschools follow:

• The Montessori Method – (an approach I have been using with Rey at home too)
• The Reggio Emilia Approach
• The Waldorf Approach
• The HighScope Approach
• Rudolf Steiner Approach

And many more.

 Curriculum + Extracurricular activities + exposure: Check the curriculum the school follows (it should not be draining for the child). Playschool, after all, is about playing and learning. Another important factor is the extracurricular activities like singing, dancing, painting etc. There should be room to just relax as well.

Student – teacher+helper ratio: One of the most important factors. Enquire about the student to teacher ratio so that your child gets proper attention. The fewer children a teacher is in charge for, the better for the child as he will receive more attention and time from his teacher. No matter how efficient, a teacher cannot run a classroom effectively and give the kids the attention they deserve running after 20 kids. Also, check for the school’s helpers ratio and involvement. They help with activities like toilet trips and feeding themselves and moving around the school premises.

Infrastructure + facilities: It helps if the playschool is on the ground floor. With so many children moving around, stairs become a threat to their safety. Check if the school has baby gates installed at every stairs entrance and exit.

Developmental milestones and observation sharing with parents: ANother important factor to consider. SOme playschools have a quarterly reporting system. I personally feel quarterly is too late especially at this stage where the child is in a constant learning phase. Ask the school how often the school shares your child’s development.

The probability of future absorption in higher classes: It is always a plus point as it will relieve you from the hassle of looking for a formal school a year later.

Fee structure: This may be the easiest factor. Get a list of affordable schools that suit your pocket and budget.

In addition to the above, another point to consider (even more than the above points) is to understand your child. Is the school’s approach aligned with your child’s personality? Take your child along for a visit. It will be good to see how your child responds to the environment, the teachers, and the school. Observing your child in the school’s environment will give you an idea whether the school and the child will be a good fit for each other.

Most importantly, trust your instincts. Do not get dazzled by the fancy equipment or play zones or a gleaming building. Don’t depend on the numbers they share of fooled by the marketing strategies they deploy. Pay multiple visits if required. Visit during school hours to get a true picture.

It is, after all, the place where your child’s personality will start getting honed.

What points did you consider when you chose a playschool perfect for your child?

Hope these points and tips will help you make an informed decision. Wish you all the best!

The post The Perfect Playschool appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

Well, it is a personal choice. Parenting is personal. I try not to judge parents who allow too much screen time, having said that it’s not something I appreciate a whole lot either. I am not perfect, neither do I expect others to be. Sharing with you all today my views and how I have been raising my son as a screen-free child.

Welcome to my world. I am a work from home mom which makes screens an inevitable part of my daily routine. Even then, I have managed to keep my son away from all screens, be it TV, laptop, mobiles or tablets. How?

Read on.

Start.

It helps to start off on the right track. An infant has no demands except for milk and sleep and a lot of cuddles. There is absolutely zero requirement of any other thing. Studies indicate that introducing screen to them at such a delicate age can have lasting negative effects on their still-developing brain.

• We made it a rule to have no screens around Rey when he was an infant. Phones were kept out of sight and he was hardly ever in a room with the TV on. And when he was, his line of vision did not capture the screen.

Set an example.

Children see, children do. They will never ask you for something they don’t see you and anyone else doing. You cannot be glued to the screen and expect your child to not follow suit. Avoid screens in front of the child. This one is a little difficult for those parents and families whose favourite time pass is watching TV or playing games on the mobile or being obsessed with social media.

• It helps that neither my husband nor I am a fan of TV. We do follow series, however, we catch up on them only after our son has settled for the night. My husband watches football matches but that’s only once in a while. As for the mobile, it is strictly off-limits for our son. His father is not a smartphone fan and I try limiting my usage when he is around. I do click a lot of his photos and make videos but switch off the screen the minute I am done. My son thinks of the phone as a camera as I haven’t let him look at the screen beyond selfies and photos. I openly discourage anyone from showing him their phone as well. Well, yeah – I am only watching out for my son. Sue me!

Phones are not a substitute.

Parenthood can be overwhelming. Yes. It can drive you nuts. Agreed. It may even make you question your sanity. Has happened to me too. But all it takes is those weak moments to give in and start the circle. Ask someone to step in if you can. Keep extra toys handy. Keep activities ready. Head out for a walk with the baby. Plan your day. Leave room for boredom

• For the last two years, I have been solo parenting to an only child, Monday to Friday from morning to night. I know how it feels to want a break. But it’s doable.

Habits.

It’s never too soon to start forming good habits. A general rule in our house is “No phone, No TV” for children.

• By the time my son was 18 months old, he would not l̥ook at the TV or pick up a mobile

Hold your ground

Children quickly learn and realize what they can get from where. If you give in too easily, they will only come on stronger next time. Hold your ground.

• Although Rey hasn’t shown any interest in screens, if anytime something catches his eye and I see him glancing at a phone, I am quick to whisk it away and not give in to his request. On those rare occasions or when on a video call – when he does look at the screen, I ensure he does not get the phone in his hands.

Now he is almost 2 and a half years old and even if TV is on in the house, he pays no attention. If there are phones lying around, they are just boxes for him, he doesn’t try to switch them on and fiddle with them.

I have, on days, switched on the TV, put on a cartoon, and recorded his reactions to whether he starts watching TV. His response instead has been to ask me to play with him and not even glance towards the screen.

I realize screen time is inevitable with so much digital influence directed towards kids – from videos to games to educational apps. I will introduce it to him slowly and gradually.

But for now, as a wise man once said: “A child should know how to hold a pencil before he learns how to operate a mobile phone”.

The post Screen or Scream – Not Really. appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

Not really. Babywearing has been prevalent for centuries. Work of famous artists from as far back as 18^th century depict women carrying their children on them. In fact as history states, Rani Lakshmi Bai – Queen of Jhansi, wore her son when she went to war against the British.

Present day too, if we cast a glimpse at our villages, women carrying their offsprings in their traditional jhola (carrier) is a common sight. If we happen to cross a construction site or maintenance site even in the city, we often see hard-working women carrying their little ones on their back and labouring away. Women and even men around the world are seen wearing their babies with pride and ease.

We started baby wearing pretty late, something I regret now. We had bought our first carrier when my baby was around 4 months and sold it by the time he was six months. Why? Because it was the wrong choice of carrier and my baby was not comfortable in it and neither were we as parents wearing it. I am glad we resumed when we did. Better late than never.

There are numerous advantages of babywearing. Happy to be sharing the top 5 basis my experience.

1. Babywearing makes traveling easier. For people who know us as, know we are travelers. We love exploring new places, new cultures, interacting with locals, etc. After we had our son, we wanted to continue our passion for traveling the world. Babywearing made that possible.

• Babywearing keeps my baby close to be hence no fear of crowded places.
• Can easliy manage my luggage and baby at public places like airports, train stations, bus deopts, etc
• Do not have to carry a stroller. A carrier anytime takes less space and is lighter. I’d happily save my baggage space for some shopping while traveling.
• No place is off limits due to the terrain – we even went trekking with our baby to a peak in Dalhousie.
• Don’t have to keep looking for an elevator to maneuver as is the case with a stroller.
• When visiting the hills – like we love doing – it keeps my baby snug and warm
• You can be out exploring for long and your baby will not tire of walking as babywearing gives both baby and parents a break.

2. Babywearing promotes bonding. It allows you to keep your baby close, hence they feel safer. They can feel you next to them, hear your voice, and feel the warmth of your body. Studies reveal that babies who are carried or worn, tend to heal faster. Babywearing means you automatically have more physical contact with your little one ultimately strengthening the attachment between the parent and the child.

• I have sometimes worn my son even inside the house, especially during the days he was sick and we were with no help. He was a lot calmer and relaxed when worn.

3. Hands-free! Which basically means freedom and independence. Yes, since you’re not using your arms to carry the baby, your hands are free to tackle the endless household chores or finish your work and meet that dealing looming around the corner.

• I have carried my son and gone shopping, stepped out for walks, written blogs, done multi-tasking all the while keeping y baby close.

4. Exercise – Carrying your baby is nothing less than a workout. Wearing makes it a lot easier however, has a similar impact.

• My only workout on days was wearing my baby and going for walks. I love walking, so mommy and baby both happy!

5. Keeps Toddler tantrums at bay – I’ve often noticed how my son throws a lot less tantrums when being carried as opposed to being on his own. I have total control over his movements so can easily manage him – and prevent him from making a scene – in the middle of a mall – flat on the ground. You get the picture!

Though babywearing is a personal choice and the discussion around it is endless. While some people claim that wearing your baby may end up making him clingy and spoil him. I beg to differ. On the contrary, Babywearing gives your child a sense of security and comfort.  It has been a boon for us and our baby. My son is now 28 months and weighs 12 kgs (all the more reason for to ensure we pack our carrier when we head out) and babywearing has come to our rescue many-a-times.

The post Wearing your baby – Spoiling or Strengthening the Bond? appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

Babies like predictability. They spend nine months in the mother’s womb, protected from the outside world, where there wasn’t much in terms of change. However, once they arrive in an otherwise exciting and chaotic world, where they are learning something new every day, seeing new faces, experiencing new senses; routine provides relief and a calming effect.

A daily routine helps bring in a consistency. Maintaining a regular routine soothes the child, be it an infant or a toddler, in stressful situations.

New Born:

A new-born, who hardly knows what’s going on around him, cannot tell night from day. Routines are particularly helpful in establishing what is known as the circadian rhythm in an infant. Circadian rhythm is a biological clock or a cycle that tells our body when to eat, sleep, etc. It helps distinguish night from day.

Newborns are too young and underdeveloped to follow such patterns. They need to be fed on demand, sleep when they want to, comforted if they need the feel to, etc. Establishing a routine should be introduced gently and gradually.  Exposing them to light when they are awake, dimming the lights of the room when they sleep, these daily habits can slowly help them differentiate between morning and evening and they learn to accordingly adjust their body rhythm.

3^rd month onwards

As new parents, it’s still a challenging time with the infant waking up multiple times for a night feed. However, small activities, like a stroll in the park, regular daily massage, bath around the same time, etc can be introduced as part of the daily routine. By the time the baby hits the half-year milestone, you will have an idea about the number of day naps he takes, his meal times, etc

6 – 8^th month

By now, you are pretty much aware of your baby’s temperament. Night feeds have reduced. Settling into a routine doesn’t look like a distant dream now. Perfect time to start working on it.

A routine imposes order on the roller-coaster that babyhood brings along. Following a routine is the first step for a baby to realize that he has rules to follow. By the time the baby is around 8 months of age, he or she starts to understand that people and objects exist even when they are out of sight. If the child realizes that he or she will be able to get back to the person or the object, they tend to remain calmer. This concept is called Object permanence.

Developing a routine:

Now the million dollar question is how to get started? There is no “by-the-book-method” for it. When my baby was born, I had no idea about how I was going to manage a child. However, as time progressed, I understood my child’s rhythm and we worked together – baby and mommy.

Another thing that helps develop a routine is sticking to the daily tasks and timelines. Establish the important times such as waking-up time, meals, naps, and bedtime. By the time a baby is one year old, he anticipates the daily tasks. He knows that after he has been massaged, it will be time to take a bath. Consistency is important.

It takes time to settle into any routine, so be patient.

From the time my son was an infant, I had been very particular about his routine. Leaving social dos early, planning my day around his naps, carrying his portable bed for extended hours outside. I’ve done it all. I have been rewarded in the long run. My son is now 28 months and barring his transitions, he has enjoyed a predictable day timeline, making our lives a lot easier. His routine is well established, giving me the liberty to plan my day. He is especially particular about his bedtime. So much so, that he slept through the dhol reception of my Brother-in-law’s wedding reception party, while he was in my husband’s arms, who was dancing to the beats of the dhol with the baraat(wedding reception). See for yourself.

Having said that, be prepared for a bit of flexibility. Even the best routine can go kaput. They can not be timed to the minute. There will be days when they will refuse to sleep even 3 hours after their regular nap time. This especially happens by the time they turn 18 months. This is the time they like to test the waters. They like to test the rules. They might not want to take a bath or change into a fresh diaper. It starts resembling a wrestling match. You may have to balance it out. The toddler will be a lot more cooperative if you let them feel as if they are winning. For example, instead of telling him that he has to wear the tee shirt, place two tee-shirts in front of him and let him hand you the one he wants to wear.

There are different view points to it. I shared the one which worked well for me and has helped my toddler remain in a safe zone till now.

It’s important to respect routines and also realize that you will never have full control over them. Stay sensitive and adaptable to your baby’s needs.

The post Routine Matters appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

However, God had other plans, and I was blessed with an angel of a boy. It was love at first sight (as is with almost all moms). I found it hilarious that people often mistook him for a girl, courtesy his long, golden, wavy tresses! It (maybe) was God’s way of fulfilling my wish of having a baby girl.

The idea of twinning was always exciting and did not disappear with the boy baby. And I thought to myself, so what if I can’t wear the same dress or same hair clips with my boy, we can still twin, right. How?

That is where Bonorganik came into the picture.

I became their customer in 2016, when my son was just 11 months old, and we were planning our first holiday as a family. I had initially visited their website to order from their fabulous Mommy and Baby collection but was soon curious by the hilariously captioned tees from the Dad and Son collection.

My husband who wasn’t very fond of twinning (that is new right?) loved the idea and the tees.

My son is now well over 2 years, and we are still not over the twinning craze! The latest in our collection are these super-fun captioned tees from Bonorganik.

If you love coordinating your outfits with kid’s or anyone else you love, then read on as to why Bonorganik is the site you can rely on.

About the brand:

Bonorganik is a global apparel store that offers tees, dresses, pajamas, boxers, ethnic wear, footwear and much more for every bond, age group, and many occasions.  What sets them apart is how they help people bond over apparel by dressing similar.

Established in 2012, it was founded by two people passionate about delivering the best. Niharika Verma and Puneet Verma have over ten years of experience in the field and are well on their way to becoming the world’s only brand that sells clothing for all relationships.

Categories:

• Just Like Dad: My favourite category! They not only have dad and son; dad and daughter, they also have a dad, son and daughter section!

I shopped from this category and personally was very happy with their collection. You too can shop the Beer Inside, Milk Inside tees combination here.

• Just Like Mom: Mom and daughter (sigh! I wish I could have shopped from here too. If you have a daughter who loves dressing up like her mommy, these combos will bring a smile on your face), mom and son (why should boys have all the fun eh?), mommy and baby (LOVE this one) and double trouble.
• Just like Us: Family and friends outfits (no one is left behind!)
• Him and Her: This is where I am planning to pick up my anniversary gift from. Shh..! It is supposed to be a surprise for him!
• Super Siblings: There is something for the pranksters too.
• My baby: Bodysuits for the little one with matching tees for Mum and Dad
• Occasion wear: There’s a whole lot here from Special Days to Pre-wedding fun to Honeymoon madness to festivals and interest-specific.

Every item comes with a detailed description, which includes fit details, fabric details, styling help, and terms & conditions.

Material used:

Most of the apparel I have bought and browsed so far has been 100% cotton. Soft and easy on the skin.

How to order:

Visit: https://bonorganik.in/

Browse through their online catalog.

Add your items to the cart and proceed to check out and make payment.

Easy peasy!

They offer free shipping in India and have the facility for paying Cash on delivery of the products till a 10k limit (check for your pin code though as there are area exceptions to this payment method). They even have an easy return policy (with T&C of course).

Go ahead, get your matching set now. After all, twinning is winning!

The post Twinning is Winning! appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

Once you graduate, the constant pressure to get married (especially for women) starts piling up. When you get married, the next barrage of well-meaning advice is to have a baby – complete your family – they say. Oh well, alright. And along comes a baby.

The baby hasn’t even started walking confidently yet and look, there’s the bombardment again – yes. You guessed it right. The baby needs company. Complete your family. You don’t want him to be alone after you’re gone. Blah blah.

Even before I got married, when my husband I were dating, we were clear on how we wanted our family to grow. That’s where communication plays a major role. Talk. Discuss. Agree (or agree to disagree). There were two things we both agreed to:

1. We will not rush into starting a family
2. We will have only one child

I am glad that we were able to stick to our commitments.

1. No matter how long you’ve known your partner and how deep your love is, the real compatibility test starts when you start living together. There are behaviours you discover, quirks you try to accept, and a family you get to know. There are agreements and arguments, celebrations and compromise, love and lash-outs. The child changes the equation between a husband and wife. From “two is company” you jump to “three is a party”, leaving you with no time for yourselves for a while. It is a journey that challenges you and tests you at your most vulnerable point. And until the man and woman cruise on smooth waters, getting a child into this world is a risky matter (purely our opinion).

We had been married three and a half years before we embarked on the parenthood journey with all our valour. And even then, there are days when we find ourselves not on the same side of the court. But we’ve learned and we’re still sailing.

2. Only one child (whether by choice or through necessity). Phew! Now this one is a little difficult to explain especially to those who think one is not enough. If you and your partner have decided to have one child, you will find a lot of people offering you unsolicited advice. After all is said and done, how many children you wish to have is solely your decision as parents. Given the times we are living in, and how unpredictable this world is becoming, this decision took a lot of thought.

• We, as parents, are happy to have one child. And as parents, it’s our decision to decide how many children we want to get into this world
• With the way the world is progressing (read a study that by 2050, all aquatic life will disappear), pollution, global warming, natural calamities on the rise, forest fires etc, why would I want to bring more lives on this planet that is already struggling to live.
• Any newspaper you pick up is full of violence, of shootouts, of abductions and rapes and murders. Living in the times of fear. Is this the society I want to raise my children in? Nope.

Yes, we were aware that no matter what decision we make, there will always be another to counter. Sharing with you a few points we as parents often ponder upon before making that humungous decision. A few benefits as well as challenges of having an only child.

Plus / Pros / Benefits –

• More time to devote to your child so the child gets undivided love and attention. Quality time with the child helping him focus more intimately on these relationships.
• Better quality of life. Let’s face it – if only incomes would increase in direct proportion to the family size! The inflow of funds is unaffected by the family size, however, the outflow and expenditure totally depend on the number of people dependent on that income. So one child = more financial stability, hence better life quality for all. An only child gets the best of everything – material things and otherwise.
• More energy – this one is a no-brainer!
• More independent child – without an elder sibling to support every step, the child will find his own footing, make friends outside of his first circle, become more social
• No sibling rivalry
• No comparisons 

Challenges:

• Growing up alone – it depends on what kind of environment do the parents foster at home. Are they around to fill the gap?
• Companionship – We all crave company our age, so do children.
• Sharing – Living with someone means sharing their space and stuff. Siblings learn that lesson pretty quickly.

Just like there are two sides to a coin, there are two perspectives towards everything. You just got to decide which one will make you happier. In the end, how a child turns out to be is totally dependent on how the child is brought up.

The post Only child? appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

It is one of the first things a couple starts to think about even before their child is born. While some couples take a lot of factors into consideration, some want the most unique name for their child. Some like it trendy, some traditional. As expectant parents, we too were super excited about what or rather who was to come. Not knowing the gender of the unborn baby only added to that excitement. Fortunately for us, neither of our families believed in consulting the pundits for a letter to pick a name from, so our options weren’t limited.

And so started the task of jotting down names that we both already liked, asking for recommendations from family and friends, picking names off our favourite TV series (skipped GoT though, imagine Tyrion or Hound going down in that list!) and movies. My friends shared excel sheets with thousands of names in them. No kidding! I am guilty of skimming past most of them though.

My husband and I looked up meanings, pronunciations, and variations of quite a few names. We discussed and disagreed, ooh and aahed and kept narrowing down the list.

Finally, around the eight month of my pregnancy, we narrowed down the names to five. Five boy names and five girl names.

And by the time it was time for the baby to arrive, we had zeroed in on one name – each for a boy and a girl.

I had really, like really wanted and prayed for a baby girl, right from the time I suspected I was pregnant till the time I was in the OT (yes C-sec because my baby refused to let go of the umbilical cord) till the very moment the doc brought the baby in front of my eyes. My gynaec asked me then “Sejal what do you think? Boy or Girl?” Even then my response was GIRL! And then she showed me my baby’s face and before she could tell me who had arrived, I was already head over heels for the little, pink bundle in front of me. That point in time, it didn’t matter what I wanted. What mattered was that I had been blessed. Blessed with the most adorable baby boy I had ever laid my eyes on. And my heart called out and welcomed the baby.

Why did we choose that name? Where did it lead us? Click on the link to finish reading the story:

https://bit.ly/2r2jZS3

This blog was originally written for World Of Moms.

The post What’s in the NAME? appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

There’s no guidebook to the motherhood journey. It solely relies on instinct and experience.

When I became a mother (still has that fresh ting to it :)), I had no idea what modern-day parenting was, I didn’t know what BLW or sleep training was, I had no clues about attachment parenting or gentle parenting, I was unaware of baby-wearing and the evolution of cloth diapering, I was clueless about Montessori learning methodologies, and the list can go on and on.

All I knew was that I had been blessed with a healthy, adorable little bundle who will undoubtedly demand all my time and love. All I knew was that I was going to do the best I could for my child. I wasn’t a part of any race or a competition. I wasn’t out there trying to show “how it’s done”. I wasn’t trying to earn the title of a “good mother” or a “hands-on mother”. All I was trying to do (and still do is) what I feel is good for my child’s well-being.

As my journey progressed, I learned from my experience, I learned from those around. But the biggest and the most important lesson I learned was to listen to my mom-instincts. I confess, when I was a new mommy, there were times when I had been influenced by how other moms were dealing with motherhood. I gained insight, learned a lot of things I had no clue about, and I am forever grateful for those who made me aware and shared their experiences. But there were also times I regretted not following my gut. There were times when their hit, sure-shot formula backfired when I tried it. I realized what my elders expected me to do wasn’t always the right or the only way to do it.

When you become a mother, there are as many pieces of advice as the well-meaning people you know. It is easy to get lost in the sea of unsolicited advice you receive.

Here are my biggest learnings from my motherhood journey I have been on so far.

• TRUST your instincts. It doesn’t mean turn a deaf ear to what other experienced mothers have to say. It simply means, follow your heart. If you feel, what they say is what might work for you, go for it. But if you feel it’s not right, no matter how pressured you feel, don’t follow that advice. My golden rule has been to – Listen to all, do as your heart says.
• It’s not a race! It’s an experience. Enjoy your journey. Don’t let how others are raising their children overwhelm you. Like no two pregnancies are the same, no two children are the same. And hence, the way they are brought up will also differ.
• There is no such thing as bad parenting or good parenting. Only parents doing what they consider is the best basis their experience and capabilities.
• Learn, try, move on. Yes. There will be failures along the way. And that’s absolutely fine. Learn from your child. Get up and start walking again.
• Social media is not an expert. There is only so much an Instagram account can tell you. Yes, there are tons of insta-moms (including myself) out there, thousands of blogs (including this one) that will give help you understand this journey, but only a mother can truly understand what her child truly needs.
• Motherhood journey: Document if you want to. Maintain privacy if you think that’s how you will be comfortable. Don’t get influenced by others.
•  If there is one person you should follow, follow your doctor’s advice. And your child’s pediatrician.
• Make life simpler for yourself by blocking anyone who makes you feel inferior. Without meaning to do so, some people end up making you feel bad. Instead of feeling inspired, you end up feeling miserable. Ctl+Alt-Del. End task. Or at least distance yourself till you become stable.Unless they inspire you.

And lastly, ignore these points if you feel they won’t and don’t add value to your journey. It’s as simple as that.

We’re always learning – it doesn’t matter from whom, others or your own experiences. As long as we do what’s best for these tiny humans, is what matters.

Would love to hear about your experience and what helped you or is helping you stay a positive person. Or what have your challenges been and how are you dealing with them.

The post Motherhood appeared first on Raising Rehaan.

Parents are the biggest influencers in a child’s early age. Everything they do or don’t do will have a direct impact on the development of the child. The first five years are known as the formative years of a baby’s life. These growing up years play a fundamental role in the child’s physical, cognitive and social skills and development. It is these years that will later define your child’s personality, health, and interests.

My husband and I are like-minded in many aspects. We were both very clear about the way we wanted to raise Rehaan even before the baby arrived in this world. He is now a 28 months old toddler who adores his father and follows his every move.

So this post is dedicated to Rehaan’s father. His role-model.

And honestly, I am not surprised as Mr, Husband is an extremely involved father. He works full-time in a dynamic role that requires all his energy and time. Yet, he manages to lead a life he is happy and content with.

• He exercises (cross-fit, muscle-building, calisthenics, yoga, running) for an hour or ninety minutes every day. The brutal winters cannot stop him, the humidity does not deter him, rain only motivates him more and holidays are an excuse to exercise longer.
  • Rehaan can be seen trying to do push-ups, asanas or generally stretching in his own toddler ways trying to imitate his father.

• He reads. From books to newspapers to articles. Being an English (H) student, that habit has stayed with him over the years.
  • Rehaan likes books. Yes, there came a phase (4-5 months) where he had lost interest in books, but its back now. His books travel with him wherever we go now.
• Mr. Husband didn’t own a smartphone until last year. Yes. He belongs to an almost extinct species of humans who are not very fond of technology and had stayed away from it all for the longest time. Even now, he accesses data-based apps only at night for a while before sleeping. TV is for matches only. And that doesn’t happen very often either.
  • Rehaan has no fascination with phones or TV. Because he doesn’t see his parents glued to the idiot boxes. Ahem.. here I  will unabashedly take the credit too as Rehaan and I are together 24X7 and I’ve managed to keep him away from any kind of screen. (saving that for another day)
• Mr. Husband is an outdoor person (we have that in common. Did someone say MFEO? But since this post is about him, I’ll mention only his interests). He loves walking through nature trails and parks and being close to nature.
  • Rehaan is turning out to be the same. Not a surprise as he is simply following his parent’s footsteps.
• Mr. Hubba is an ardent football fan.
  • If you’ve been following raising_rehaan’s insta stories, you will already be familiar with how much he loves playing the game too.
• Mr. Husband is a health-nut. He is a rabbit who can survive on veggies all around the year. He is one of those who would make sure to check the ingredients label on any packed food item. No, he is not finicky, he is simply conscious of what goes into his stomach and body.
  • Rehaan loved eating veggies too. His favourite these days is Orca (bhindi). Oh! he loves pasta too (that he takes from me, so I make sure I give him the healthy version of Pasta in Daal Sauce – recipe here)

This father-son duo is truly living up to the proverb – Like Father, Like Son.

And though there are days when I forget to appreciate Mr. Husband for his support (and there are a lot of such days), I couldn’t have asked for more. He truly inspires me and everyone around him to lead a simple and healthy life. I am a proud wife and a fortunate mother to have Mr. Husband as family.

The post Like Father, Like Son appeared first on Raising Rehaan.